2 Lovers. 1 Summer. 9 Songs.

"Exploring the Antarctic is like exploring space. You enter a void, thousands of miles, with no people, no animals, no plants. You're isolated in a vast, empty continent. Claustrophobia and acrophobia in the same place, like two people in a bed." - Matt

Yesterday's an unusual day of celebrated idleness..I loved it! I've undulged myself watching French love flicks 'till the rest of me, me eyes got tired. Thanks to the subtitles and to the shiny Belucci dvd cover. It's "Malena" up front so I borrowed it from groovy friend Suwei. Or so of course the other titles are flashy like "Tie Me up, Tie Me Down" and "Anatomy of Hell" amongst of 8 films. Dang! I must have really loved that day.

I pre-viewed which film I should watch first. Sure I know wonderful "Malena" already from it's dubbed premiere on cable tv. The 2nd, 3rd until the 8th preview..I'm surprised, shocked, appalled! Ok just a little surprised. I realized I am to see an erotic movie parade. Yes, porn. But really I'd prefer learning it as a for-arts-sake-it-is-french-anyway movie series. Thank you Malena.

I'll try my best to put up a good review. I would higly recommend "9 Songs" of them all. You cannot, please dare not stay together with the kids when watching this film. I am sorry I lied it's an all french series, but this one, is an American film of 2005, shot in a British environment, conveyed with a French feel. Uh-huh? 'Tis not porn at all. 'Tis A love story. It made sense that they've incorporated such simple storyline with the rock songs played by bands in between significant events (I'm not sure if the're 9 in all). Awesome awesome score! The movie is a lovetale of 2 people, Matt and Lisa, happening in the early stages of their relationship. Despite of it's naked explicit scenes (as sex is), the lines were natural and so softly delivered, as how would other indies go. But it's not at all confusing. 9 Songs is lyrically beautiful. I learned how uncomplicated love could be, how affairs could be so real and expressive of pure passion, of painful sadness, of hate, of longing, and of loving again. Ain't easy, but simple really.

Having the acquired taste for sappy movies, 9 Songs is good romance alternative film. I almost hated myself crying for this. Weh. I liked Lisa's character. She had a rad air and an egotistical crazy way of affection for Matt. I couldn't help but symphatize with her rebelliousness for the most part. Also the portrayal of the lovers' youth helped made a bittersweet ending to their story. Ok I'll not spoil your curiosity about the whole film. I'm not really good on making reviews. I'm a lame critic. But for my friends, specially, if not outstanding, 9 Songs is worth watching.

Rock and roll!

Transmissions from the Satellite Heart

It seems..it will rain.. You’re happy about it aren’t you?

It is a blessing..blessing for our fields. Insha-Allah we will have good harvest this year.

But the crops, they won’t be reaped ‘till February. You won’t be here anymore.

Yeah but I’m not worried. I trust you. You’ll know how to manage thru in this deal. I shall give you instructions. Would that be ok?

Uh..Yeah I guess.

Nah..You can do it. You'll be fine.

He put down the cup of coffee on half spilled and he didn’t care. His nonchalant smile gleamed at me from across the wooden table. It was a semi-bright still afternoon. I would always remember these moments when me and dad would have laid-back conversations. I’m just happy he’s with me. Each year, for all the years of my life, he’s been spending vacations with us. Either Christmas or Summer, our house becomes a home, complete with all of the family, present and together. Each year, for fifty-two days.

My first meeting with my father was very unlikely for me. I had to make some real improve, a good coy of what it would feel like to be with him, in a picture. Mother would always build him up like a superhero who, though far away from us, will always just be near, because he’s supportive, loving, and telekinetic. She would write captions on the back of my pictures and send it to dad, as if I wrote it, as if I was a smart 3 year old kid. I felt for mom ever since. I have learned how it became such a struggle for my parents to live apart for a long time now. She wrote her all-occasion letters, and recorded our taped messages. I would participate in a scripted happy message. I thought we’re only making a school project. I was feeling indifferent still after we’ve finished.

The years passed. I now have an adorable sister who best suited in a wrestling match, if not in heated debates as we grew older. (Physical pain I would prefer is better.) From baby-hoods to sweet-sixteens to mid-life crises, dad has possessed his superpowers and promises. We’ve not never ever been spoiled brats, nor crazed with latest gizmos. (nevertheless The Moffatts had invaded and became a phenomenon.) From recitals to PTA’s to loyalty awards, events happening to students we are, father was all busy, all patient and homesick, all determined to give us a better life, I have all understood.

I wish to be positive that my parents have succeeded in bringing us up to – if only possible – be the kindest, most endearing kids. Well I’m not going to brag, simply because there’s no reason to. But like I said, all the determination I’ve seen from my father’s eyes, providing for and raising us his children, is the toughest as a president’s responsibility. He took it so seriously, and we know we made his mind bleed more often. That alone is one reason I am grateful for a father so loving, a reason in a million more.

Now that I’m older, I’d hate to say grown-up, but yes I am learning from the good and the not-so-good circumstances and phases in my adult life. I am happy I could distinct in between differences, all because my father taught me so. He’s always this hugely mild influence in the process of making my own decisions. He is truly one figure I look way, way up to.

We’ve had much interesting times talking in his precious free time. We’ve debated in mostly religious matters. It was more spiced up considering he’s a Muslim and I, an apprentice to become a vegetarian Buddhist. I didn’t mind though as long as we both agreed animal slaughter is against the law of God. All the insights he would unconditionally testify and define for me, as if he’s the greatest Imam ever lived. I've never felt his energy emanated that way again. I would always be enlightened. Then there was business talk. I would always pretend to be sleepy. I am bad at math.

Nah..You can do it. You'll be fine.

Uh..Yeah I guess.

That is how our relationship has evolved. It was unique in a way, as at times I have confused longing with sadness. It was a crazy long distance affair. I love my father to death. If only I could possess the same superpowers he has, I’d probably be in a hologram talking to him in person at this same exact time. Can't afford 3G.

Oh well. I could always put it in words.

I miss you dad. I'll make coffee again for you soon.